Balance, It's a process

Balanced describes a person who moderates all aspects of his or her life-physical, mental, social, and spiritual-and has found the perfect mix of all these attributes. Balance sounds like a characteristic of the Christian faith, like a goal to seek after or a quality worth cultivating. Balance sounds like a worthy ideal, a perfect description of a healthy follower of Christ. Beware of balance. (Michael Yacconelli, Messy Spirituality)

Beware of balance. Wait a minute, balance is a good thing. Right? When things are upside and chaos seems to be reigning in life, most of us try to balance whatever seems to be in our way. We try all kinds of options to get to the end result of our plan. Meantime God is just waiting for us to surrender to His timing and His way. Most of the time we have no idea what that is. So we continue to try to accomplish our plans creating expectations for life and relationships and then find ourselves trapped. Perhaps we aren't trapped but planted.

"For I know the plans [machashabah] I have [chashab] for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper [shalom] you and not to harm [ra] you, plans to give you hope [tiqvah] and a future [achariyth]."  (Jeremiah 29:11)

Now I do not know how to pronounce all of those words. But this is a paraphrase of the verse.

For I know the purpose that I am planing for you; the purpose is for completeness, soundness, welfare and peace. The ultimate purpose of your life is not distress, misery, injury or calamity. It is to give you hope and something to expect in the after part-posterity and your reward.

So if God's purpose is not to cause us problems it must be the opposite. It must mean that we're not trapped by our present circumstances or situation but rather planted. We are where we are because God wants us to learn something. Now, what is that something. Only God can show each person what He wants us to learn. It's all about a personal growing relationship with God. That's why He's the only one who can show us what we are to learn in order for us to grow and become (what a friend of my calls it) seasoned.

God may use any circumstance in our life to teach us how to be content. He will use the circumstance whether we fell into the situation ourselves or we caused it. God will draw us closer to Him. We might be saying that we want to change and grow. But who is actually able to command themselves to grow or mature? No one. It's a process.

Many things in life are a process. Tanning for me is a process. Ten minutes here, thirty minutes there, and eventually, I do not frighten people away with my whiteness.  I use that example to show just how we set expectations for ourselves and how God is waiting for us so He can readjust our expectations to His ways.

Perhaps the expectation you have set was that all of your family members would live and die of natural causes at an old age. Or maybe it's that your relationships would have open and good communication. Or even your children would obey with you only having to tell them once.  It may be an expectation that would be silly to others, like having a tan. The point I hope I've made is that no matter what expectation we set for ourselves, we've set it. It's up to us to let God have control to build His way in us.

Unless the LORD builds the house, its builders labor in vain. Unless the LORD watches over the city, the watchmen stand guard in vain. In vain you rise early and stay up late, toiling for food to eat-for he grants sleep to those he loves. (Psalm 127:1-2)

Sometimes the way forward is the way back.  Let God reset and have control of your life. Don't fool yourself, He has always had control of the reset button.